I had only taken care of myself a couple times since I arrived here. I have also not cleaned up my hair since so I had the 70’s porn star look going...on. I’m sitting in my room by myself and then my computer starts ringing with the video chat. I answer and me and my beautiful wife talk about the day and what she is going to do for the day. She tells me she needs to vacuum and turns the computer so I can watch. This doesn’t sound like a good time so I start getting dirty thoughts. “You should. The bathroom was silent as I fell silent, the only sounds my breathing and his breathing. He extracted his fingers from inside me and I guided them to my mouth. I sucked on his two fingers, tasting myself, revering in the experience we had just shared. I was suddenly acutely aware of a sensation pressing against my butt. It felt like his jeans, but a lot harder. "Baby... what's that?" I turned, shining with sweat, and saw the bump in his jeans. "Can I...?" I reached for his jeans as he nodded,. My eyes were glued to Susan as she walked casually over and sat close to me on the sofa. I love to feel relaxed in silky clothes she said and sipped on her drink. Slowly she started to talk about love making and sex, she told me her husband had died a few years before and had been very active in sex and satisfied her well, her last partner (bridge player) was weak in sex and at 70 years age his performance was not satisfying for her and wanted to make sure I can perform well in bed.Quite openly. My mind is swimming with all the times we shared and how much fun we had. I still cannot understand why I was not good enough. I keep playing back through to see what it was that I did wrong and I could have given him more faith in me and in us. In his most recent letter, he conveys to still care for me and wishes to remain, friends, as we had originally intended. As tempting as this offer is, I cannot seem to fight off the desire for something more. In addition to this hopeless love that I.
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