I knew damned well that the woman loved me after all of those years. So telling her that if she really loved me, she would eat her soup just seemed mo...onic and unnecessary. However, it was what I did.All she really wanted was for me to sit by the bed with her and hold her hand. The medicine, her doctor told us, would make her better sooner, also put her to sleep in no time. She slept most of the first couple of days. So like any good husband, during her periods of lucidity, I asked her. " I just said, "You're jealous because I goton with the girls better than any of you monkeys, and yes, I was beatenup quite a few times for that." Hakim looked very sorry for me and said,"In my culture you would be highly prized." I laughed and said, "Thankyou, you've made my day saying that."Little did I realise what he meant by it all.Nothing more was said until few weeks later, when we were having lunch atour local wine bar, When he said, "One of the reasons that I came overto England was. Scheider had said. What you need to be as an actor is authentic. Apersona is just setting yourself up for failure. My head was a whirl ofconfusing thoughts and emotions. I'd been wined and dined, wooed andromanced, and had given myself to this man. I'd wanted to. I'd had sex.And then, what had happened? Ellen had confessed? He knew? How long hashe known?"I have to go," I say, my voice wavering, my head swimming. I climb outof the bed, pulling on my panties and bra, buttoning up my dress. "Shut off the car please." I kill the lights. Betsy shines the light in my face. I squint towards her mirrored glasses, soft little girl chin, flushed skin on her neck, smooth white chest beneath her tight top with bare midriff, tiny cop skirt, bare young legs, tight skin, boots like a motorcycle cop up to just below her knees. The buckle of her holster belt well below her belly, tilted back on her flat abdomen sloping down towards her mound but creasing as her thighs swelled forward, skirt.
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