I'll just wait here in the motorhome," she said."You're not hungry?" I asked."I… I don't have much money," she said sadly. "I had to get out of ther... too fast. And he didn't let me have any money of my own; that was another of his control things. He was so afraid I would leave him or cheat on him that I couldn't have any friends or any money. I had to be completely dependent on him for everything." Well don't worry about it. Lunch is on me. Let's stop and get some groceries in you!" I said. Believe that he’s there. Then there’s light and the shower is still running. I leave it on even though the water bill is too high to pay. I like the sound of the water rushing over me. Let the water pour. Clean and hot and desensitizing, destroying prints and calluses, burning away bacteria, boiling needles to the surface of my skin. Mindless, hopeless activity. I sit in the shower without forgiven and need and lust and longing. The scars will never vanish. Never fade completely. But remind me. It was well after noon the next day that I could not stand anymore and just had to sleep. My thinking had dropped to almost nothing and I was making more mistakes than not on decisions.When I woke up, I knew the battle was still going on. My hearing had improved but it was the heavy thuds I could feel through the ground. I was in a camp hospital. I managed to find something to eat and drink before healing those I could. Other people were in charge of the battle and they could just carry on for. "And I've seen your goddamned meat before anyway! In the showers, takin' a piss..." Rob's voice trailed off. He was standing facing Paul, his long—very long—slender rod, with the large, bulbous head, clearly visible, rigid and pointing across the clearing. More precum leaked from the prickhead."But you were just wonderin' what my cock looked like with a hardon." So? You never wonder what another guy was like with a boner? Ah, screw it!" Rob's voice was a mixture of anger and defensiveness as.
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